THAT'S SUSHI

Open on happy couple sitting at a table at a fancy French restaurant.

ADAM
I am so excited to be ordering dinner at this restaurant!

MILICENT
Me too!

Waiter enters.

WAITER
Gentleman, lady.  Welcome to Chez Chantique.  Tonight is a very special night, as our head chef is back from 7 years of total seclusion in the Andalusian Mountains, where he has been developing a secret recipe for a revolutionary new dish.  And you are in luck, because this dish ... is tonight's special.

MILICENT
Do you hear that, Adam? Revolutionary.

ADAM
Yes, I do, Milicent.  (to waiter) What is it?

WAITER
Well, what it is, is... a sliver of RAW fish, which is then surrounded on all sides by white rice, and then delicately wrapped in sea...weed.

ADAM
Oh.  So... sushi.

MILICENT
Fantastic.  I love sushi!

WAITER
Pardon me?

ADAM
Sushi.  Your special is sushi.  The Japanese have been making it for centuries.

WAITER
Well, perhaps there are similarities, but I highly doubt it is the same dish.

ADAM
It's raw fish, wrapped in rice, wrapped in seaweed.

WAITER
Well, it's not just fish.  Sometimes we replace the fish with cucumber.  A cucumber "roll", we are calling it.

ADAM
Yes.  They do that too.

WAITER
Well, our chef's dish tends to taste best when dipped in soy sauce.

MILICENT
Just like sushi!

(Pause)

WAITER
Well, do they serve it with Ginger?

ADAM
Yes.

MILICENT
Wasabi?

ADAM
Yes.

WAITER
Do they occasionally put cream cheese on it and call it a Philadelphia roll?

ADAM
Yes.

WAITER
This is very disappointing.  Our chef had even had the idea of setting up a bar area where you can order pieces of--

MILICENT
You mean like a SUSHI bar?

WAITER sighs.

WAITER
I see.

WAITER goes to the kitchen door.  He calls for the chef.  The chef comes out.  The waiter talks to the chef, gesturing to the couple.  The chef nods solemnly.  The chef hangs his head and goes back into the kitchen. After a moment, a single gunshot rings out.

BLACKOUT.